Lawyer quotes

[Skywing]

Some of these are rather funny.  For instance:

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.

[iago]

Heard it before, but still love it

[SNiFFeR]

The programmer's prayer

Our Program, who art in Memory,
   hello be Thy name.
The Operating System come,
   Thy commands be done,
   at the Printer as they are on the Screen.
Give us this day our daily data,
   and forgive us our I/O Errors as we forgive those
   whose Logic Circuits are faulty.
Lead us not into Frustration,
   and deliver us from Power Surges.
For Thine is the Algorithm,
   the Application,
   and the Solution,
   looping forever and ever.
Return.

[CrAz3D]

 That is a lawyer quote SNiFFeR?

[SNiFFeR]

nah, It's on the page though.
http://www.cse.ogi.edu/~diatchki/jokes/prog_pray.html