The Quotes Thread

[Hazard]

I've got to ask you... about the penis mightier...

~"Sean Connery" on Saturday Night Live

[tA-Kane]

Anywhere you really understand what you are doing, you can do it without defects.

--Ted Kaehler

[iago]

"I hearby reject your reality, and replace it with my own"
- Myth-busters

[j0k3r]

Saw it in someone's sig... or somewhere.

A compiler is a program that tells you how wrong you are

And it brought this to mind...

A compiler is a program that tells you how wrong you are, just like the bible.

[iago]

The kid thinks Rincewind is a demon he summonned:

The boy looked at the open boo.  "My command searlier resume," he said firmly.  "The most beautiful woman who has ever lived, mastery of all the kingdoms in the world, and to live for ever.  Get on with it"
Rincewind stood frozen.
"Well, go on," said Eric.  "You're supposed to disappear in a puff of smoke."
"Listen, do you think I can just snap my fingers---"
Rincewind snapped his fingers.
There was a puff of smoke.


Rincewind gave his fingers a long shocked stare, as one might regard a gun that has been hanging on the wall for decades and has suddently gone off and perforated the cat

-Terry Pratchett, Eric

[Skywing]

Ah, another Pratchett reader!

[iago]

[still in the demonology stuff]

When he was left along, he wandered over to the lectern and looked at the book.  The title, in impressively flickering red letters ,was Mallificarum Sumpta Diabolicite Occularis Singularum, the book of Ultimate Control.  He knew about it.  There was a copy in the Library somewhere, although wizards never bothered with it.
This might seem odd, because if there is one thing a wizard would trade his grandmother for, it's power.  But it wasn't all that strange, because any wizard bright enough to survive for five minutes was also bright enough to realise that if there was any power in demonology, then it lay with the demons.  Using it for your own purposes would be like trying to beat mice to death with a rattlesnake.

-Terry Pratchett, Eric

(Notice the initials of the book's name)

Skywing - yeah!  I'm trying to read them in order, but I have huge gaps.  I have them all as ebooks, but I'm trying to buy them.  

[Skywing]

Your library doesn't have any?  They had most of them at the library back home...

[iago]

Your library doesn't have any?  They had most of them at the library back home...

Yeah, it does, but I have to order them in from a different branch.  I did for a couple, but I'd really prefer owning them.  :/

[hismajesty]

Saw it in someone's sig... or somewhere.

A compiler is a program that tells you how wrong you are

I beleive it was in Yoni's profile on battle.net for a while.

[Hazard]

Lisa, Bart, the two of you tried your best and failed miserably; the moral of the story, never try.

Trying is the first step towards failure.

~Homer J. Simpson

[iago]

Greebo, who had been rubbing obsequiously against Nanny's leg, looked up and hissed.  The largest and blackest cockerel Nanny had ever seen had settled on Mrs Gogol's shoulder.  It turned on her the most intelligent stare she had ever seen on a bird.

'My word,' she said, taken aback.  'That's the biggest cock I've ever seen, and I've seen a few in my time.'

Mrs Gogol raised one disapproving eyebrow.

'She never had no proper upbringing,' said Granny.

'What with living next to a chicken farm and all, is what I was gonig to say next,' said Nanny.

'This is Legba, a dark and dangerous spirit,' said Mrs Gogol.  She leaned closer and spoke out of the corner of her mouth.  'Between you and me, he just a big black cockerel.  But you know how it is.'

'It pays to advertise,' Nanny agreed.  'This is Greebo.  Between you and me, he's a fiend from hell.'

'Well, he's a cat,' said Mrs Gogol, generously.  'It's only to be expected.'

[muert0]

http://www-gap.dcs.st-and.ac.uk/~history/Quotations/Einstein.html

the best one on this page is from mrs.bush:
http://www.quotationspage.com/subjects/war/

[iago]

"Vegetables are what food eats."

[j0k3r]

I went as far as to highlight this (in a book I'm borrowing from the library)...

I then thought that my father would be unjust if he ascribed my neglect to vice or faultiness on my part, but I am now convinced that he was justified in conceiving that I should not be altogether free from blame. A human being inperfection ought always to preserve a calm and peaceful mind and never to allow passion or a transitory desire to disturb his tranquility. I do not think that the pursuit of knowledge is an exception to this rule. If the study of knowledge to which you apply yourself has a tendency to weaken your affections and to destroy your taste for the simple pleasures in which no alloy can possible mix, then that study is certainly unlawful, that is to say, not befitting the human mind. If this rule were always observed; if no man allowed any pursuit whatsoever to interfere with the tranquillity of his domestic affections, Greece had not been enslaved, Caesar would have spared his country, America would have been discoevered more gradually, and the empires of Mexico and Peru had not been destroyed.

- Mary Shelley, Frankenstein