European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl rite n styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in
ze forst plas.
That's great.
Quote from: CrAz3D on November 04, 2005, 06:00 PM
European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl rite n styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in
ze forst plas.
Haha
HAHA
FOR REALS?
GNO ITZ FR RLZ~
I remember this. :)
LOL nice :P
I remember that, good stuff :)
Going to show that to my English teacher. :D
I understand what happens but I don't understand what's funny..
Say the last few lines outloud & then look @ the part that was talking about the other lang choice being German.
Yes, I got that, but I didn't find it funny...
Quote from: hismajesty[yL] on November 05, 2005, 11:21 AM
Yes, I got that, but I didn't find it funny...
Get a fucking sense of humor and stop acting like everything has to be so serious and some sort of fucking intellectual-superiority talk has to come into the thread.
Quote from: Mephisto on November 05, 2005, 02:58 PM
Quote from: hismajesty[yL] on November 05, 2005, 11:21 AM
Yes, I got that, but I didn't find it funny...
Get a fucking sense of humor and stop acting like everything has to be so serious and some sort of fucking intellectual-superiority talk has to come into the thread.
LOL!
You live for this stuff, eh Trust?
Huh?
Quote from: hismajesty[yL] on November 05, 2005, 03:01 PM
Quote from: Mephisto on November 05, 2005, 02:58 PM
Quote from: hismajesty[yL] on November 05, 2005, 11:21 AM
Yes, I got that, but I didn't find it funny...
Get a fucking sense of humor and stop acting like everything has to be so serious and some sort of fucking intellectual-superiority talk has to come into the thread.
LOL!
sweet. Nice come back